Once upon a time, no one knows where, in a world, similar to ours, two gods were fighting. Florus, the god of the skies and the upper world said he was the strongest, the most beautiful god and the one with the most power. All in all, he thought he was the best! The humans in their world loved and admired him; they built chapels for him and prayed.
The other god couldn’t care less about all that stuff. He was cruel, well most of the time, and he had his own world to care about. So why should he care about Florus and his perfect little world? He knew he was stronger, more powerful and even better looking then his selfish cousin. Why should he care?
But one day he got a message from Florus. The god of the upper world wanted him, to admire Florus! The cruel god became angry; he changed his mind and travelled up into the skies to see Florus.
But the selfish god wasn’t stupid; he knew if he would make an example of his strength, his face wouldn’t stay as beautiful as it was. The cruel god was mighty after all. So he suggested a game.
Both of them would choose a human from the upper world and let them fight. But not fair. Don’t ever think these gods were fair! He thought the humans would never ever make a contract with that demon god. They feared him!
Florus had chosen the girl which was the most like him, beautiful, popular and selfish. Her hair was as golden as the sun, she prayed every day to him and she had influence.
The cruel god didn’t know the humans, so he closed his eyes and chose somebody without looking.
The very next day, he went down on the earth in his human body to meet the blond girl. She was walking to school. Florus stepped out of the trees, in front of her and said, “Hi.” She smiled a fake smile and said the same. “My name is Florus, and I need your help, Isabella!” Her fake smile became honest. “Florus?” she said surprised, “Really?” He nodded. “So, what can a girl like me do for a god like you?” she whispered in his ear. “Oh, I would know some nice things to do,” he said smiling and pushed her away gently, “but first we have to win a bet!”
In the meantime the cruel god tried to meet the girl he had chosen.
“This world sucks!” I thought when I walked down the way. It was just another sucking day! Everybody listened to Isabella, talking about her Make Up and her clothes and her perfect face. Is that all you should worry about, clothes, Make Up and Isabella’s face? No, thanks!
The only stuff I used for my face where black. Mascara, kohl and dark red-purple lip gloss. All my clothes were black, well most of them. I was just twenty years old, but life had already been sucking!
When I was at home after school I just dumped my bag in my room and walked to the cliffs. I loved to be there. The sound of the ocean made me calm and quiet. I used to go there every day after school. It was a good place to think about everything.
I was standing in front of the cliffs, one more step and I would fall.
The waves hugged the shore, the wind whispered stories from different countries in my ears and the sun heated up my body. All in all, you could say it was a beautiful day… “What would change if I would jump?” I thought. “Would somebody miss me? Would they even realise that I was gone? No one would care. The only difference would be, that this world finally would be perfect… really everyone would care about Isabella, everyone would wear the same clothes as she did and everyone would be like her.” Then I started to smile, because I just realised, “But I am here! And as long as I am here, this fucking world is not perfect! As long as I am here, everybody has the chance to become themselves!”
“You’re not going to jump!” somebody said behind me. “Excuse me?” I asked, turned around and lost my grip. I didn’t mean to jump… but now I would fall… but I didn’t… the guy held me around my waist and pulled me back. “Don’t fall!” he said smiling. “Who are you?” I asked when we had a few metres between the cliffs and us.
He was tall, slim, athletic and sexy; he had long fingers, hair as black as the night, a straight nose, beautiful lips and green intense eyes.
He was as perfect as the rest of this world!
“My name is… Kai.” He said. “What? You have to think about your name?” I asked sarcastically. “I was just wondering if I can tell my name to a girl that almost fell into death. And what is your name?” he smiled and tipped my nose with one of his fingers. “I’m not going to tell my name to somebody, who almost made me fall down the cliffs!” I replied crossly, “I got to go!”
The guy started to laugh, “What are you going to do, black haired cutie? Are you hungry? Or do you wanna do your homework?” He snapped with his fingers and a table with food and two chairs appeared beside me. He did it again and another table with my school stuff appeared. I screamed in surprise and fear and I tried to go backwards, “What the hell are you?”
He stopped smiling and looked amazed, “You really don’t know?” I shook my head and reached the rocks. He came closer, “Nobody told you about me and my cousin up there?” He pointed up to the sky. He was just telling me, that he was the cousin of this… god? So he was something like that as well? I started to laugh. “What is so funny about me, being a god?” he asked crossly. His eyes could have killed! He beat his hands next to my head against the rock, so that it was shivering! I was still laughing, when I shook my head and said, “His cousin?”
Kai shook his head and his forehead sunk down on mine. His eyes were closed, when he whispered, “So, so, you think it is actually funny, that he is my cousin, hmm?” Suddenly I stopped laughing. It was really impolite to laugh about other peoples families. “Sorry!” I whispered. “No, no, it’s ok. I would just call him… selfish or annoying…” he said in a low voice and opened his eyes. “Now, tell me everything you know about him!” he went on in a mystic voice and stared at me.
“Well,” I said, “I don’t really care about that stuff, maybe you should ask some of his fans? They study Florus, god of the upper world and the sky’s. I don’t. Can I go now?”
His head was still leaning on mine, when he looked at me in surprise. “What?” I asked, and tried to move a bit. “Why won’t you just do what I told you?” he whispered. “Hmm… Let me see, because I don’t want to! I’m not your slave or something like that!” I said. He seemed to be a bit confused when he lifted his head. Quickly I slipped out through his arms, grabbed my school stuff from the table and ran homewards.
“What the hell was that?” I asked myself. “That guy was totally strange!” I reached the door and shut it behind me again. Breathing fast I sunk down on the ground, I closed my eyes. “That was close!” I thought.
“What do you mean by you don’t want to?” asked that guy. I started to scream. “How…. How… how did you… come in?” I tried to catch my breath. “I was waiting for you!” he said confused and shook his head again, “What do you mean by that?” Slowly I stood up, “I am not going to talk about this god stuff!”
The strange guy was standing on the stair rail, his knees bent. His head was almost lying on his shoulder, when he looked at me and said, “Why? I asked you to!” What? I banged my hand in my face, “Did you ever hear something about a free will? That’s what I got! A mind to think and a mouth to say what I want. Not as all the guys in school and… well in this whole world!”
Kai laughed, “Well I guess they are busy thinking about my cousin!” The only thing I could do was smile and to roll my eyes. That was exactly my point! “So what?” I asked. “What do I have to do to get rid of you again?” Still laughing he jumped off the rail and looked into my eyes, “So, you wanna get rid of me as fast as you can?” “Oh wow! You got it!” I said clapping my hands.
The guy shook his head and laughed, “You really wanna know what you have to do, to get rid of me?” I rolled my eyes again and nodded. Wow, he finally got it! “Be my partner!” he said seriously. My mouth fell open, “What? – Wait! Why the hell should I do that? I already told you I don’t want to be involved in this god stuff!” Still serious looking, he said, “Because you want to change the world. You want that everyone gets the chance to think for themselves. And you don’t like my Cousin Florus. You don’t know me, so you can't hate me! Well, not yet!”
Well, he was right. But that wasn’t reason enough for me to become his partner! How could I be sure about that? How could he say that I wanted to change the world? How could I change the world? “You know what, I got to go. I have some… business… down in my world. I’ll come back tomorrow; you have some time to decide. Talk to you later.” The black haired guy said and disappeared.
What on earth was that? These god guys were all the same, strange and selfish. Never ever in my life, would I even think about helping him! I grabbed my bag and through it onto the sofa, went into the kitchen and tried to think about something else. But that wasn’t as easy as I thought. Everything was about this stupid god stuff! School, the perfect things in this world, the cliffs, the house, homework… finally I gave up. It was just impossible not to think about that.
The worst part of all that rubbish was that he was right. I really wanted to change this world, I wanted to make everyone themselves again, I wanted to free them! Was the price for that too high? No… I just had to do something for this strange guy and he would help me to free this world. My head fell back, that couldn’t be true… so much trouble, just because of him! In the moment I just wanted to forget so I went upstairs in my room, closed the door, locked it, locked the windows, closed the curtains and popped into my bed. Quickly I fell asleep.
When I woke up, everything seemed to be normal, so I stood up, got dressed and went down to have breakfast. When I was alone, I started talking to myself most of the time. That was one of the silly things I started to do after my mother died… “It must have been a dream… there is no such thing as… well… Florus is real, he comes down to us from time to time to give us the chance to admire him… but… no… the other one… he couldn’t be real… Well he was real as well, but he never comes up onto the earth… so why should he do that now?” “Because I can’t stand it if Florus tells lies.” a voice behind me said.
I shrugged and turned around, “Why do you always have to do that?” “I was listening to your theory why I can’t be real…” he said and shrugged his shoulders. While I exhaled, I tried to calm down as well. This guy must be insane! “What are you doing here? And did you ever enter a house trough the door and by ringing the doorbell and waiting till somebody opens or not?” Kai didn’t laugh, he looked serious, “You know why I am here. Don’t tease me! I’m not in a good mood today!” I rolled my eyes shirty, “Oh nice…” Suddenly he seemed to be angry; he walked me against the wall and clouted his hands against the wall. He took a deep breath, exhaled again; his eyes where shining in anger, his teeth clenched when he slowly said, “Do not bother me!”
“Relax!” I said and lifted my hands, “Gillian Barbara Ryan.” He stepped backwards, “What?” “My name...” He nodded, „Gillian… Do you know the meaning of your last name?” Ryan or “o Maoilriain” meant king. My mum used to tell me about that when I was a small girl. She was talking about destiny and my name… I nodded. “It is the destiny of your family to rule this world.” He said smiling, “Maybe my choice wasn’t that bad. You know I started to think I should have chosen someone else…“ I closed my eyes and shook my head, “I wouldn’t mind… So what do you want?” “Well actually you don’t really have the chance to choose… I need you to free this world.” He said seriously.
“If it is nothing else… What are you dreaming of?” “Maybe I’m dreaming of you?” he said smiling again. I just ignored that comment… “Anyway… How could I wake up all these guys? They are focused on Florus since generations!” “Well this is going to be my problem. But I will figure something out! You just have to be nice to me, and I’ll make it as fast as I can.” He said with a confident smile. “We’ll see…” I said.
“Don’t you have school?” he asked after a while. “So what?” I asked. „It is time to go!“ he said happily. I rolled my eyes, grabbed my schoolbag and suddenly we were standing in front of my school.
I didn’t wear the clothes I was wearing a minute ago… “I like your dress!” Kai said, standing beside me, smiling… I was wearing a short black dress, no sleeves, no holders. I looked at him in anger, “What is that?” “A really nice dress, you should wear stuff like that more often!” a smile hushed over his face. “Will you make it right again? I want to wear my own stuff!” I said crossly. “No way! That is part of my plan!“ he said, shaking his head. Crossly I walked to my class, just to find my table circled by some girls in dark clothes, they were chatting and laughing.
When I came closer they stopped talking, looked at me and one of them said, “Why didn’t you tell us that your boyfriend is changing into our school?” My mouth fell open and I asked in horror, “What boyfriend?” “Kai of cause, you silly goosy!” the girl said. Her name was Claire. That was his plan??? Telling everyone he was my boyfriend? What a stupid plan…
“Well… I guess I kind of forgot to tell you…” I said confused. I had never ever talked to those girls before… Why did they talk to me? “You know, Gillian, if you don’t want him anymore… well… just tell me, ok?” she said with a dreamy smile. I rolled my eyes, “I’m so sorry, but I don’t think he is good enough for you girls!” They looked at me crossly and went back to their own seats. When the teacher came, he brought Kai into the classroom as well. I wished to disappear… but the teacher already told him to sit besides me.
“Are you trying to kill me?” I asked crossly. “No, I just try to satisfy your wishes.” He answered smiling. “You told them you are my Boyfriend? I do not wish for a boyfriend, I just wanna get rid of you again!” “I didn’t talk to anyone except for you.” “So what did you do? What did you do to make them think you’re my boyfriend?” I whispered. The teacher was already looking over to us. “I changed their memory… You told them.” He said with a huge smile.
“Now it is your turn to start changing them. You have to try to wake them up, let them choose what they wanna do. Give them back their minds!” he said after the lesson in the corridor. “And how will I do that?” I asked still cross. “Show them it is good to be yourself. Or you could become friends with Isabella and make her go down…” “Ok, enough… I hate her! I’m definitely not going to become her friend!!!” I said baneful. My head sunk back against the wall, “How can I do that? Nobody is listening to me anyway!” “Maybe you should start to believe in yourself!” Kai said, placing his hands gently next to my head. He came closer and whispered quietly, “Try to believe in you as I do!” “What are you doing?” I asked and pushed him away from me.
Then he smiled again and walked down the hallway, “I’m sure you can do that!” I exhaled and opened my eyes again. Five boys were standing in front of me. Dressed in black clothes, black hair, black shoes, they had gel in their hair and long fringes in their faces. The first one’s feet were crossed, the third one was looking angry, he had his arms folded. The second one was smiling; he stood behind the first and the third. The forth one was looking to the last one. The last one had his left hand on his lips. They looked a bit like a rock oriented boy band! A bit confused, I looked at them and asked still baneful, “Do you want something?”
The one, who looked crossly, said, “Are you alright?” “Yes?” I said, still not knowing what they wanted. “That guy!” he said again, “Did he hurt you?” “What?” I asked. “No! Who are you?” “We are Pierre, Luis, Henri, Kimi and I’m Mika.” Said the one in the middle and everyone nodded when they heard their names. “So what do you guys want from me?” I asked. The forth one, Pierre, laughed, “No, we are here to protect you!” And the first one, Luis, said, “From guys like him!” He nodded in the direction where Kai had disappeared. “We think he is no good for you!” said the second one, Henri. And Kimi said, “You never noticed us, because you’ve always kept yourself alone… But… we think he is no good for you!” “Okay! What ever…” I said, shaking my head. I’ve never seen them before… that was true… I closed my eyes and tried to breathe. “I got to go back in my class…” I said and walked in the opposite direction of Kai. The guys followed me… This day was the weirdest day I’ve ever had!
After the classes I walked out of the school, Isabella was standing on a stage, talking about herself, as usual. When I walked towards the stage I wasn’t thinking, I was just so cross about Isabella, Kai, these stupid gods and the strange guys; they were still following me. Carefully I made my way through the crowded students. I pushed Isabella away from the microphone and said, “Why are you guys listening to this brainless crap? You have a brain to think! Why can’t you be yourself instead of trying to copy Isabella? Why does everyone try to be like her?” I looked into their faces and smiled, “Wait! Not everyone! I don’t wanna be like her! So do these guys!” Someone out of the crowd shouted, they would copy me. “I wouldn’t say so. They can do what ever they want. If they wanna wear that, ok, fine, if they wanna wear blue and orange; sure, why not? It’s their life! It’s our life! Why do we have to copy someone? Why can’t we be ourselves?” I shouted and walked down from the stage.
Everyone was staring at me.
Kai started to clap his hands. Some others joined in, others called for Isabella and I walked passed Kai, pushed him out of my way, followed by the boys, homewards. They were all jerks! “Nice speech! You seemed to be angry.” said a voice behind me, when I sat on the sofa in my room. “What a surprise! It is my personal god!” I replied crossly, “And I thought I could have some peace.” “Gillian, Gillian, and I thought you would like your boyfriend!” he said shaking his head. “I really liked your speech, Gillian!” he went on. “I just said the stuff I was thinking…” I said tired and closed my eyes again. “Well, it was really good, Gillian, and I think, at least some of them will think about what you said.” “I don’t care!” I sighed.
When I opened my eyes again, his face was right in front of mine, I shrugged and our heads bumped together. “Ouch!” I said, rubbing my forehead, “What are you doing?” “I was just trying something.” He said, without moving his head. “Can you do that somewhere else? Please?” My head was sore; he really had a strong head. Strong and hard! The way he looked at me, made me feel cold. “No.” he said, “But I got to go!” And he was gone. Sighing I went to bed, it was just five o’clock, but I was so tired.
The next days were the most terrible days in my whole life! Isabella, of cause, didn’t like the stuff I said about her and about thinking, so she told everyone not to talk to me and to ignore me and what ever. She even tried to make Kai fall in love with her. But he just pushed her to the side and said; she should start to think about what she did as well.
Well, but I couldn’t see her face, when somebody, as perfect as herself, dumped her! Pierre told me about it. I guess that was the day I started to like the boys. Kai didn’t stop to change my clothes so I took some with me in my schoolbag and changed in the girl’s bathroom. Surprisingly Kai didn’t go mad when he found out… actually he started to laugh.
But that was just the beginning. We got a new pupil, a blonde guy, good looking… but everybody seemed to know him since ages. His name was Shane.
School was even more sucking then ever. Of cause the new guy and Isabella were hanging out most of the time. It was really… disgusting how much arrogance and selfishness could possibly be in one place. Some of our classmates had actually started to wear stuff that was totally different to Isabella.
I started to be a bit proud of myself. But that ended very soon. Soon everybody was ignoring me, even the teachers. It was weird to be ignored, I never liked too much attention, but it was weird to be completely ignored. Just the boys and Kai were still talking to me.
“What do I have to do to get rid of you?” I asked again after one week of ignorance. “What about ignoring them?” he said laughing. Angry I looked at him, “I wouldn’t do anything else, but then I won’t get rid of you anymore!” The god looked amused, “Would that be so terrible?” “YES!” I said nodding my head, “You know, I can’t stand it if somebody is following me all the time. And I like to choose myself what I wanna do or not!”
“We have to do something to change them!” he said, suddenly very serious. “What about Flyers?” So we made tonnes of flyers, telling everyone to start doing what they want to do. It was really fun to make them. The seven of us were joking about mean things we could write on the flyer, like “You are stupid if you copy Isabella! She is just like a little puppy! Start to think for yourself!”
But we threw the flyers away again, nobody would read them. We had to do something else. They wouldn’t change just because we told them to. We decided to show them how much fun it was to do what we wanted to. Kai wasn’t helping very much; he was watching us, while we had fun.
One day, when the sun was shining bright and warm, we started to have a water fight after school; we were all wet, even Kai was having fun with us. Some others were watching. I felt, that they would love to join us. The boys started to let them join in, just in case I sat down in the shadow of a big tree, next to the strange god of the underworld. Soon lots of our schoolmates were playing with the water of the fountain on the school ground. They filled their bottles and ran around with them, making everybody else wet.
They even through water on Isabella, she shrieked and shouted, “Who started to do that mess? That is so childish!” “Guess who!” I called over. I so totally hated her, not just for being so… arrogant. Angry she walked towards us. “Fine! If you want war! You can have it!” she said crossly. “Hey, wait, you are ignoring me, and I just had some fun outside. Can’t change it that water is wet and that fun sometimes changes your look. Start to laugh and have fun with everyone!” I said laughing. “So it is war!” she said and looked at me madly. Isabella walked away.
Worried I looked over to Kai, but he was all chilled out. “What are we going to do now?” I asked. The underworld god, just smiled, leaned backwards against the tree and said, “Well, I guess it is too late for Plan B. So, relax, take it easy.” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. How could he say that? I didn’t want to relax! I wanted to get rid of him! So I had to do it myself. If Isabella wanted to start war, fine, she’d get it!
But I was too old to do stuff like tricks. I had to find another way for my revenge!
The next day I was alone at home, I was just getting ready to go to the cliffs again. It was early in the morning; I opened my windows to let some fresh air into my room. I closed my eyes while the sunshine heated up my body. With a sigh I turned around again and took a skirt and my bikini out of my wardrobe. I planned to jump today. Jump down the cliffs, further down, in a small bay. When I pulled up my skirt, I glanced over to my chair, searching for my black shirt I had been wearing the day before. “Where the hell did I put that shirt?” I said to myself, when somebody replied. “Here it is!”
I jumped back in surprise and shock, “What the hell are you doing here?” The strange god was sitting on the small sofa next to my window, holding my shirt in his hands, when he glanced at me. I followed his eyes, saw my half naked body and screamed, jumping over to my bed, covering myself with the blanket. “Nice piercing.” Kai said smiling cheekily. “What the hell are you doing here?” I shouted angrily. “Just wanted to check up on you!” he said still smiling.
“So, is that so?” I asked suddenly calm. My brain was thinking, he was a man and I just figured out a way to give some of his teasing back to him. I put the blanket back onto my bed. “So…” I said quietly. My skirt was still opened, and I wore no shirt, just my bikini. I bit on my first finger of my right hand, while I let my left hand run through my hair. Kai suddenly looked alarmed, not sure what was going on, but definitely interested in what I was doing. Slowly I walked towards him, my right hand on my stomach, next to my silver piercing with the small sparkling stones. “So, you like what you see?” I asked seductively and leaned over him, putting my hands next to his shoulders onto the sofa.
Surprisingly his eyes were fixed in mine, and not somewhere below… I placed my left foot on the sofa, between his knees. “So what did you just say about just checking up on me?” I asked still calm and sexy. Kai just nodded, but in his eyes I already saw the knowledge of something even he didn’t know yet. Something that he wouldn’t like, something I planned to do right now. “I was just checking if you’re still alive, after we started war yesterday after school.” He said a bit breathless. Then I changed my face and looked at him crossly, his eyes opened wide, “What the hell are you thinking! You were spying on me, you jerk! If you like my piercing, why not trying it out yourself, I would be pleased to offer you my help! Men are all the same! Well, not just men…” I said and laughed crossly, “EVERYBODY in this fucking world! Why can’t I just be myself without you following me all the time and spying on me? Just fuck off with that ‘It is my destiny to rule this world!’ talking! I can’t hear it anymore!” Kai’s expression changed into something I couldn’t describe, it was a mixture of anger, curiosity, excitement and something else I couldn’t find out before it was gone again.
In the next second I was lying on the sofa, my hands next to my head under Kai’s hands, he was kneeling above me, his head close to mine. I stared at him with my eyes wide opened. “Could you please tell me, what you are doing to me?” he said in a hush. In my head was just a big question mark… no clue what he wanted from me. That position was too dangerous for me, but I couldn’t move. The god above me was scary in the moment. My heart was racing, my mind thought about the worst scenarios that could happen to me now.
Kai was close, too close for me to see something else than his eyes, looking at me in a scary way. When somebody was ringing my door, Kai looked at me for another second, stood up and walked down to open my door. I just closed my eyes and tried to breathe for a second. As soon as my heart wasn’t racing anymore, I jumped up from the sofa, closed the zip of my jeans skirt, grabbed my black shirt from the sofa and ran downstairs.
After greeting the boys I just took my chucks, glanced at Kai angrily and pulled them out of the house again to go. They wanted to jump as well. I didn’t even ask the stupid god if he wanted to come or not. I didn’t like him even more than ever. Henri was walking behind us, when I turned to ask him why, I saw him walking next to Kai.
Soon we reached the cliffs, leading to the bay. Actually I planned to climb down, but jumping seemed to be better for my mood right now. So I just took off my skirt, shirt and Chucks, through them down onto the sandy beach and walked further up, towards the sea.
“You can climb down the cliffs over there, Kimi; you guys shouldn’t start from up here. I’ll be with you in a few seconds, ok?” I told my gang when they wanted to follow me. They had never done it before, so they shouldn’t start from that high. Just because I was crazy, and mad, they shouldn’t jump down from there… It was dangerous, too dangerous if you didn’t know what you were doing.
I didn’t check if they really climbed down, because I just wanted to jump right now. I didn’t care if they were looking after me, to check if I was still alive, as soon as I was in the water, or if I would fall onto the cliffs before I could reach the water. I didn’t care.
So I walked to the edge of the cliff and glanced down. The water was high enough to jump. Slowly I turned around, walked a few steps back, turned around again and started to run. With a long jump I was over the edge, flying through the air, falling towards the water. I turned myself around and broke through the surface of the water with my fingertips, my hands, my arms, my head, my body, my legs, my feet and my toes. The water was calm today, cold and quiet. There must be a storm coming up.
Suddenly, I didn’t have time to reach the surface again, when cold hands grabbed me and pulled me up. “What are you doing?” I shouted angrily when Kai pulled me out of the water. “You jumped!” he said looking cross. “So what?” I asked, “I told you I was going to jump! You knew I would do that!” “But not from that high and not that close to the cliffs and not when you were so angry!” he whispered through his teeth. Staring at him, the boys ran towards us, “What happened? First you jumped and then he looked worried and ran after you! Are you all right?” Still staring at Kai I nodded, “I told you I was just cliff diving!” “What ever!” he said and walked to the edge of the bay, next to the cliffs, sat down and made a face.
Ignoring him I turned to the boys, “So, now let’s go cliff diving!” Unsure they followed me to the cliffs and we started our training session. First we just jumped down from two meter, but climbed up higher quickly. It was really fun to teach them to jump away from the cliffs and to control their body during the jump. I guess that had been one of my best Saturdays ever.
Later when the guys went back home, of cause after walking me to my house, Kai appeared in my kitchen again. He was sitting at my kitchen table, staring at me crossly. “What?” I asked already annoyed. He didn’t move.
I rolled my eyes and went on cleaning my kitchen. “He is here.” He said after a while. “Who is here?” I asked without looking at him. “Florus!” he said. My plate fell out of my hand. I didn’t realise it fell on the ground and broke. I just stood there, shocked. Though my brain went on thinking, and I almost shouted, “Shane!” “What?” I turned around and looked at him, “It must be that Shane! He is definitely new, I’ve never seen him before, BUT everybody else seems to know him since ages! It was the same with you! Just that you pretended to change school, but everybody knew you were my boyfriend, except for me!” Kai thought about what I said and nodded, “Must be.”
He was still staring at me gloomily. “What else?” I asked a little cross again. He didn’t reply. I turned around in a hurry and slipped on the wet pieces of the plate, I lost my grip and should have fallen to the ground… But Kai looked at me even more crossly then before, now holding me in his arms. “Do I always have to save you?” he whispered not as gloomily as his eyes. “Thank you, and no you don’t, things like this happen every day so don’t worry about things like this.”
“I thought about the cliff!” he replied quietly. I rolled my eyes, “I told you I was cliff diving and I am not stupid, I do know what I am doing! You could have joined us, it was FUN!” Suddenly he smiled again; he was still holding me like a Baby, my left shoulder tight to his chest, my legs over his left arm. I couldn’t move.
Kai came closer, I felt his breath on my skin, then suddenly his lips touched mine and he kissed me! Because I couldn’t free my hands to smack him, I bit his tongue! “Ouch! Why did you do that?” Kai said crossly, still holding me. “Because you kissed me, you jerk!” I shouted at him and tried to free myself out of his arms. “You kissed me back!” he protested, not even thinking about letting me go. “No I didn’t!” “Yes, you did!” “No I did not!” “Sure you did!” “I would never want to kiss you! I tried to get down!” “No you kissed me and tried to jump down!” “What?” that made absolutely no sense, “I did not kiss you back!” “If you think so, fine!” he said, putting me down on the sofa, lifting his hands in resignation. “You’ll get that back!” I said through clenched teeth. “Ok!” he said smiling and wanted to kiss me again. I kicked him off me and shouted, “What is your problem?” He laughed, “You wanted to kiss me!” I cursed him back to where he came from and walked upstairs into my bathroom. I locked the door and went for a shower in my bikini, you could never know…
But he didn’t come.
Back in school on Monday, we asked our schoolmates to come as well, because it was so much fun to jump off the cliffs. Pierre and his enthusiastic character helped a lot to find some volunteers, to join us and to spread the word about our cliff diving trip for the next weekend.
Isabella, of cause, heard about that. So she planned to throw a party in her house, drinks and food free. From day to day more students came in their own style of clothes, parts very weird, but finally their own style.
On Saturday we met lots of students at the cliffs. Even one I wouldn’t have expected. The tall blond guy stood a little aside the others, staring onto the water. Not understanding what was going on I punched Kais arm, “Why is HE here???” The god looked, as surprised as I was, over to Shane, “I don’t know. Let’s ask him.” “NO! We can’t do that! That would be completely rude!” I said punching him again. “Could you stop doing that?” he asked crossly, rubbing his arm. “No chance!” I laughed and punched him lightly again for fun. “Don’t be naughty, or I’ll have to punish you!” he said with a smug smile. I punched him again and ran away laughing to hide behind Mika. Kai just shook his head and followed me.
After introducing the best way not to fall onto the cliffs, and separating between beginners and those who already did cliff diving before, we climbed down into the bay. It was quite full. The beginners started at the low cliffs, as the weekend before with the boys. The other ones started further up, on the other side of the bay. Kai was still just watching. It was great fun and everybody was laughing. Later that day, when we climbed up the cliffs again, somebody put on some music and somehow we had a cliff-beach-party. Some others brought some drinks and some snacks from somewhere and the party was great fun.
When the sun started to rise, everybody was gone again, just Kai and me were left in the bay.
It was quiet. I knew Kai was there. “What do you think?” I asked him quietly, “About Shane?” He sighed, “I don’t know. I’m not sure. I’m pretty sure he is Florus, but what does he want? Does he spy on us? Is he cheating? Or is he curious? Does he want to figure out what we are doing? Or is he trying to manipulate us?” I turned around to see his face. It was serious and dark, as if his thoughts were printed right onto his face. “What do you think about him?” “I don’t know,” I turned back to the waves, “He was nice, he was having fun with us. But I still have the feeling that he doesn’t belong to us. He is not from the school, he IS new. He definitely is! I don’t know…” Shaking his head he embraced me and glanced over my shoulders towards the ocean. “Let’s get you home, you have goose bumps everywhere!” he said quietly and a second later we stood in my bedroom. The strange god let go of me, said good night and disappeared. The goose bumps didn’t vanish, although it was warm in my room. So I quickly changed into my pyjamas and cuddled up in my blanket.
The next day was Halloween. It was like a tradition for me to celebrate Halloween. Although it seemed to be childish, I loved Halloween. My costume for this year was a vampire, or at least something similar to that. After dinner I took a shower and dried my hair, I put on some make up to make my face look pale, I put on a mask and my long dark blue skirt, the blue and red corsage, the black necklace with the chains and the cross, the black net gloves, I put my black cross earrings into my ear holes, I tied my hair into a bun and fixed the rose with a black spider web into my hair. My fingernails were all black and I just tied the laces of my black, high heel boots, when I heard a knock on the door.
Pierre stood in front the door in his wizard costume. He looked really great!
So we went off to the schools Halloween party. Most costumes were really good, I couldn’t recognize most of the students; Isabella was one of the only people I was really sure about. She was dressed up as a beautiful angel. The others were matching Halloween a bit more, monsters, zombies, mummies, demons, vampires, witches and wizards. Soon we found Luis, Henri, Mika and Kimi, but just because we knew what they were.
Everybody was dancing; the music was great and the drinks were delicious. After a while the guys were dancing somewhere else, so I danced with a tall guy in a devil costume. He looked really great, it suited him really well. He was taller than me, he had green eyes, his long fingers were covered with red material, it felt strange, but still kind of interesting. We danced for a while together, then the music changed and they played a romantic song. The devil guy smiled, pulled me closer and we danced closer to each other, his arms around my waist and mine around his neck.
Somehow we were kissing a little while later… He was a good kisser and I didn’t want to stop. Although I didn’t know who he was, it felt familiar. I didn’t care who he was. “Hey vampire girl!” said Mika behind me, pulling my arm, “We have to go!” Still kissing the devil boy, I tried to get rid of him, but he pulled me back. “Sorry, I guess I have to go!” I said, out of breath, while Mika pulled me backwards out of the hall, leaving the devil boy far behind. With a sigh I turned around and walked out of the school to meet the other boys outside of the school. “That was a great party!” I said smiling.
“What happened?” asked Henri curious. “She made out with some guy!” Mika said a bit cross. Pierre looked worried, “What about Kai? Isn’t he your boyfriend?” Oops… right, they still thought Kai was my boyfriend… “Well…” I started, when Mika interrupted me. “If that’s all it takes to make you happy!” he said and kissed me. Shocked I pushed him away from me, “What are you doing Mika?” “You don’t need any strangers!” Mika said cross, before he could go on, Luis, Henri and Kimi pulled him away from me, Pierre said quietly, “Sorry for that, he is just jealous. He has a crush on you, that’s one of the reasons why he doesn’t like Kai… Well, and that’s the reason why he is cross now.” With a sigh I shook my head, “Is he going to be alright again? I don’t want to loose you guys as my friends!” Pierre laughed, “He’ll be fine. We won’t let you down. We told you we would protect you, remember?” I nodded slowly and Pierre walked me back home. “You look great by the way!” Pierre said after a while. “Thanks Pierre, you look really great as well.” I replied with a smile.
When I woke up the next morning, Kai was sitting on the sofa next to my window, looking at me patiently. I stretched and stared back at him, “What did I do to deserve a visit that early in the morning from a god like you?” “I’ve been observing the students. They started to think about what they want to do, all of them, except two of them, Isabella and Shane. I think you are right about his identity. I think you are right about him, being Florus. He is too much like my idiotic cousin.” “And so is Isabella.” I said quietly and sat up in my bed, “But I know she is in my school since ages, so no chance of her being your cousin.” “What if he tricked you too? What if he manipulated your memory like he did with Shane and like I did with all the others?” Kai said seriously. “Well, I don’t think so, he couldn’t fool me with Shane, and I didn’t do what you told me, too. I think I am immune against your powers… or at least immune against your manipulating powers.”
The evil god looked at me for a while in silence, than he stood up and came closer, sat down on my bed, right next to me, and stared into my eyes. He came closer, still staring into my eyes. I didn’t move an inch, I tried to stare him back, but it didn’t work, he just came closer. Next I tried to push him away, but he just came closer and kissed my lips. With a shock I realised that it felt the same as the kiss with the devil boy! “Devil boy!” I said in a hush when he released my lips.
“I didn’t start that yesterday, I was just dancing with you!” he said with a grin, defending himself. I stared at him with wide eyes. Did he know that Mika had kissed me? “Don’t blame Mika!” I said with fear in my voice. “What?” he asked a bit confused and stared at me. “Well… for what happened after we did…” I said covering my mouth with my hand. The god looked out of the window, “I don’t blame him for kissing you. It is hard to resist such feelings and especially if the object of a man’s desire belongs to someone else.” His eyes turned back to mine, “I will not punish him for loving you!” His eyes full of sadness.
Then he was gone.
I didn’t know why, but tears ran down my cheeks, why did he look so sad? What happened to the cruel god of the underworld? How come he was so sentimental? Still crying I sank down on my pillow and tried to calm down. It didn’t work until somebody gently stroke over my hair. Kai tenderly pulled me towards his chest and whispered, “Gill, it’s all right.” “Did you know it was me?” I asked still sobbing in his chest. “I did.” He said quietly. “Why did you let me do that?” I whispered. “I don’t know. I wanted to protect you, so I asked you for a dance.” Kai kept stroking gently over my head and my back, “I didn’t think about the why. You seemed to like that, so I just joined in I guess…” “Bullshit you jerk!” I whispered, “Just tell me the truth! That you wanted to kiss me anyway! And you would have done that earlier if the guys wouldn’t have distracted you!” The god grabbed the roots of my hair, pulled my head back, looked into my eyes for a second and kissed me again. “If you say so!” he whispered and went on kissing me, I couldn’t do anything, even if I would have wanted to free myself, I couldn’t have managed to do that. “I knew you’d like it!” he said with a confident smile. “Jackass!” I said quietly, knowing he was right. With a chuckle he came closer, just to kiss me again.
“Do you know why I love Halloween?” he asked when we were sitting in my kitchen, having omelettes for lunch. “Maybe you like it because there are monsters all around? Because they act all just like you?” I asked with a glance towards his face. Shaking his head he smiled and said, “No, silly. At Halloween they celebrate to be different. They celebrate to scare away the evil ghosts. They celebrate me in a kind of way even they don’t understand. But I do enjoy all the fun they have, celebrating me.” “You are full of confidence, you idiot!” I said a little cross, “Maybe they just try to scare you away with their masks and everything?”
The god of the underworld leaned over to me, “You should know about it, it is not clever to make me mad.” His eyes full of pain and suffering. Not him, but me. I could see it in his eyes in that very moment. Things he could do to me, things I wouldn’t even think about, things to make me suffer.
“I’m quiet already!” I said holding up my hands to give up. “You know what? I really can’t understand why you can’t stand your cousin. You guys have so much in common!” I said while I started to clear the table, “You are just as perfect and arrogant as this world used to be and as perfect as Florus thinks he is!”
“So you think Florus is NOT perfect, but me?” he asked with a strange smile in his face. What the hell had I gotten into again? “Erm… well… I… I don’t know. But I do know that Florus just likes humans because they admire him. He just uses us as funny toys he can manipulate as he wishes.” I replied carefully. The mean god nodded, so I went on, “And you… You don’t use us, at least not as obviously as your cousin. And it seems that you try to help us.” “So,” he came closer, “You really believe I do help you? And I am perfect?” “That’s why I think you’d fit in perfectly, at least as soon as I’m gone, everybody can be perfect again, you jerk! Why do you care so much about being perfect?” I said crossly, moving backwards.
“So, I’m perfect, I’m a jerk, what else, Gill?” he replied softly. So I started to tell him my very long list with names I could and would call him, “Jerk, idiot, pervert, devil, monster…” Kai just kissed me again, so that I couldn’t finish my list. But I just let it happen. One of my favourite things to do was kissing, and this perverted underworld god was just too good at it!
A knock at the door interrupted us. When I opened the door, Mika stood in front of me, he didn’t seem to be too happy. “Sorry about yesterday. I shouldn’t have done that. But you shouldn’t have done the other thing either.” He apologized quietly. “Mika,” I started when Kai appeared behind me. “Does he know?” my friend asked with a glance to Kai. “It was him, Mika! He dressed up as that devil guy!” I answered a little embarrassed, “Do you wanna come in?” But Mika shook his head, “Nah, enjoy your peace and be happy. I’ll see you at school!” And off he went.
“Do you like him?” the voice behind me asked seriously. “Sure, he is one of my friends.” I replied and started to clean up the kitchen again. “No, I mean, do you really like him? Do you love him?” he turned me around to look into my eyes, “Do you love him?”
Did I love Mika? No! He was a friend, but I never wanted more! At least not from him! He was my buddy, not my lover! So I shook my head, “No!”
“Because, if you do, I can cheat easily and let us win, then I’d just disappear and you can…” he started to offer a future without him! That was just what I wanted all along, wasn’t it? It wasn’t because of anybody else, just for me! I could live in peace again! Then one little word made its way up into my mind. Cheat.
“You jerk! You can’t cheat! You shouldn’t cheat! If you wanna win, win with honour! Don’t you have any pride?” I shouted at him, furiously. “You really are cute.” He said smiling. “Why are you like this? You make me go crazy!” I said while I tried to look away. “You are so cruel, Gill!” he said still smiling. “I don’t like you!” I said stubborn, but couldn’t move. “You know what? I’m out of here!” I said fast, slipped past him and hurried out of the door, down towards the harbour.
What was I getting myself into? What was this feeling? I had always liked kissing, but why was it so much better than usual when it was with Kai? With a sigh I jumped into the small speedboat that my family owned and started the engine to drive out towards the open sea. I needed some peace and quiet to think about what happened.
Did I like what was about to happen? Did I like that much attention from the others? Normally I’d avoid attention as much as possible. But now, did I have a chance to change this situation again? Did I want to go back to the way it used to be? No. Definitely not! I was glad that people started to think for themselves, but I didn’t like the feeling of them expecting me to do everything for them, to prepare their freedom for them! Shouldn’t they fight for their own freedom? Wasn’t it just like throwing them out of their secured nest and expect them to be able to fly?
With a sigh I stopped the engine and stared into the sky, sank back down on my back and let my feet hang down into the water. How could I change everyone? How could I possibly teach them how to fly by themselves? Did I know that for myself? Did I really do what ever I wanted to do? Or did I just do what everyone expected of me? Did I really want to be the revolting girl? What was it that I wanted anyway? Was it freedom? Or did I just want to fit in somehow to have my place in this world like everybody else?
What about Kai? Did I like him or did I hate him? Was there something that was really clear in my life, something constant? Something I knew that would be here forever? Something I knew that I really wanted it and I was willing to sacrifice everything for? I wasn’t sure…
Suddenly the boat started to rock a bit and I knew I wasn’t alone anymore. “What’s up Kai?” I asked with my eyes still locked on the clouds above me. “Are you ok?” he asked, “Do you need help with your boat?” He sounded very worried. “No.” I said annoyed, “My boat is just fine, I was just hoping to have a little bit of privacy out here at least. Some space to think!” “Fine!” he said a bit hurt and disappeared again. I wanted to apologize for being so rude to him; it wasn’t really his fault… at least not entirely. With a sigh I sat up and tried to start the engine, but it wouldn’t work. Annoyed I opened the lid of the engine and saw what the problem was. That jerk had loosened the wires of the engine, so the petrol couldn’t get to the engine! I cursed and quickly fixed it again, closed the lid and started the engine to drive back to the harbour.
A few metres before I reached my house, I slowed down. What exactly did I do? What would I say? What could I say? Should I say sorry? I mean, I had planned to do that, but he had been gone before I was able to do so!
Gloomily I sat down in front of the house. My head sank down onto my knees. This stupid idiot! I really had planned to apologize! How could I change that he had just disappeared like a little brat?
“You seem to be upset. What happened?” a voice besides me asked and made me jump up to my feet. Still shocked, I replied, “What are you doing here?” Shane smiled, “Well, actually I wanted to say thank you for the other day, it was great fun.” “You’re welcome?” I replied drily and waved my hand, sliding down to the ground again and placing my head on my knees.
“So tell me, what happened?” he asked nervously and sat down besides me. “Nothing! I just… You guys are just terribly hard to understand and it’s impossible to satisfy you! What do you want?” I cried crossly. Shane looked at me a bit shocked, “Me?” “No!” I said gloomily, “Yes! All of you, every single male creature!” Shane chuckled slightly, “Well, I want to win, I want to beat Kai at this competition and I want everyone to pray to me and love me. As of men in general, that is easy as well. A man wants to control the woman; he wants her to love him and to please him. What Kai wants… that is a question I cannot answer, and even if I could, I wouldn’t since I want him to loose!”
I chuckled slightly, “Are guys really that simple?” The god of the skies nodded and so I asked, “Why is it so important for you to win against your cousin?” Somehow I didn’t even want to think about him… I didn’t want to say his name.
“Kai is just a bastard…” Shane said and shrugged his shoulders, “I know I’m the best, so why shouldn’t I win against that gloomy idiot, that didn’t even care about this part of the world before I said I was better than him. That’s all. Well… I’ve got to go… I’ll see you around I guess.” “Whatever…” I said and sighed, “Thanks for talking to me…”
When Shane was gone, I went inside. But Kai wasn’t at my house. “Damn!” I cursed and kicked my sofa, “You’re always here to annoy me! But now that I want to apologize for being so unfriendly on the boat you’re not here you jerk! Oh! And thank you for messing around with my boat, but I can handle my boat alright, so loosening the wires won’t be enough if you want me to stay out on the sea until I beg you for help!” I kicked my sofa again, knowing that he didn’t hear me anyway and stamped up to my room.
“Damn! You’re always here, you’re everywhere. But right now I wish you were here! Damn, damn, damn! What I’d do to have you here. I wish you were here! Damn, damn, damn! What I’d do to have you near! Why did you have to leave me, mom?” I sobbed in my cushion, hoping that no one would see me like this.
The next morning Kai still didn’t show up in my house. Maybe he would come to school and be just like always? Maybe he was busy. Why did I care so much? With a sigh I grabbed my schoolbag and walked to school. Pierre, Henri, Luis and Kimi were waiting in front of school. Mika wasn’t there either. Confused I followed the guys to class and didn’t really listen to what our teacher said, thinking about Kai. Was he mad or something? Did I hurt him by saying that I didn’t need his help and that I wanted to be alone out there? But why wouldn’t he give me even a chance to apologize? What could I do so he would forgive me?
Kai didn’t show up all day during school. Did he have other business to attend? What about Mika? Was he sick or something? I still had some studying to do at home, we’d have exams soon. Too soon if anybody would ask me…
But when I came home, I didn’t feel like studying at all. So I just changed into my bikini, put a skirt and a shirt over it, grabbed a towel and walked down to the cliffs, while I put the towel in my bag. Was I really that worried about that stupid god? The annoying god who made me change the students in our school, the one who told me it was my destiny to rule this world! How come I had never heard of that before? Could he just come here and through my life upside down and tell me I would have to rule this world when the time was right?
I sighed resigning. It was undeniably true that I had feelings for him. Not only that I thought he was annoying and a really good kisser. Oh mother, why couldn’t you be with me anymore? I would give so much just to have her near one last time, to have her hug me gently, pat my head and tell me it would be alright. When I was younger I would always ask her for advice. I didn’t know much about my dad and mom used to refuse to talk about him. Except that she loved him, I didn’t know anything about him. Nothing! And I wouldn’t get to know more, probably.
Quickly I shook my head; I didn’t want to think about my mother. I had reached the cliffs; did I feel like jumping down? It was only a few seconds, but while I jumped I felt free. Free of problems, free of trouble, free of sorrows and free of sadness. There was only the freedom of falling. The adrenalin pumping through my body, making my senses more alert and my sorrows disappear.
I would jump.
After putting my clothes into my bag to the towel, I closed it and threw it over the edge of the cliff down to the beach. I took a few steps backwards and started to run, pushing my body away from the cliffs. It felt so good to fly. I felt free, I felt at ease and I felt happy for the first time in quite a while. I felt really happy and in peace with myself. The fresh water didn’t take away these feelings, so quickly I swam back to the beach and found Kai sitting next to my bag in the sand, glaring at me.
“Hey mister grumpy,” I said smiling, “Don’t be mad, please.” I sat down in front of him, trying not to make him wet, “I’m sorry about yesterday. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was just… a bit overwhelmed by everything. I love the ocean so I always go there when I have to get clear about something. I was confused about Mika, annoyed because you wanted to cheat, irritated by myself and then you appeared. I’m sorry I said that I wouldn’t need your help and all that.”
“I had a meeting with one of my allies.” Kai finally said, “It was about Shane. He thinks you’re right about him being Florus. We have to do something. I want you to stay away from him.” For a few seconds I looked at him confused, was he jealous? I had planned to tell him of the little conversation I had had with Shane, but maybe I shouldn’t after all. Kai would tear off Shanes head in this grumpy mode if I told him about it! “If my god tells me to do so, I will obediently follow his orders.” I said chuckling and reached for my bag, when suddenly Kai grabbed my arms and pulled me closer, “I’m serious, Gill, I want you to stay away from him.” “Kai! You’re getting all wet now!” I protested, unable to avoid the water drops dripping on him. “I don’t care about the water, Gill!” Kai said impatiently holding my arms even more tightly, “Promise me, no, swear to stay away from him!” “Ok,” I said, “I swear to stay away from him! Can you let go now, please? You kind of hurt me.” Immediately Kai let go of my arms, and examined the red marks while they disappeared. “I’m sorry,” the god of the underworld said, still staring at my arms, “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” “It’s alright.” I said, trying to figure out what was going on. Was he really jealous?
Once again I reached out for my towel, when Kai lifted my head so I would look at him. The god pulled me closer and kissed me passionately. At first I wanted to protest, because he pulled me closer in his arms, but I somehow felt that he needed to hold me tight in his arms. Kneeling in front of him, I put my arms around his neck, while Kai pulled me gently on his lap.
Suddenly the wind stopped and so did the water, dripping down my hair and my body. Instead I felt dry clothes cover my skin, but I was too busy to check what Kai had done or where we were. The sand was gone as well.
I felt Kai’s hand on my back, when suddenly he stopped kissing me and put his head on my shoulder. “I’m sorry!” I heard him whisper in my hair. “What for?” I asked confused, not letting go of him. “Sorry, for what I was going to do.” Kai said quietly and I finally looked around. We were in a dark room, sitting on a big bed out of dark wood. The blanket and the cushions were covered with a dark red silk cover; one wall, probably the window, was covered with thick black curtains; the high ceiling was decorated with ancient motives and decorations like in old castles; the floor was covered with a dark wooden parquet floor and the door was decorated with strange carvings that I had never seen before. Other than the bed there was no other furniture in the room.
“Where are we, Kai?” I asked confused, slowly loosening my grip around his neck. “You’re not worried about what I was going to do to you?” he asked tired. Was Kai alright? He didn’t sound or act like usually. “Not right now.” I said, letting my fingers run through his hair. “We are in the underworld. This is my bedroom,” my personal god explained, “I’ll bring you home when ever you want.” “Are you alright?” I asked worried when I felt his heart beat fast against my chest. “I feel so exhausted…” he whispered in my hair. “Why don’t you lie down and sleep for a bit?” I asked, but didn’t dare to push him down on the bed.
“Don’t want to sleep.” Kai said sullen and buried his face in my neck, holding me even closer. That was so cute, almost like a little puppy. “What would make it better?” I asked still worried, “When I didn’t feel well as a child, my mom would make me some soup and cuddle up in bed with me until I felt better.” “Try it!” he commanded, “But don’t even think about getting soup, I won’t eat it!” “So you don’t like soup?” I asked and tried to reach the blanket. “Don’t like it?” he asked and a shiver ran through his body, “I despise it!”
“You have to get under the duvet! Come on you useless thing! Get well soon, because it’s more fun kissing and fighting with you when you’re all well!” I protested, when I gave up trying to reach the blanket, “Geez! Forget the last things I just said! Just get under the blanket and relax!”
I was glad that Kai’s face was still in my hair, so he wouldn’t see my face turning as red as a tomato. “How could I ever forget what you just said?” my god asked and looked at me, “That was the sweetest thing you ever said to me!” Still blushing I took my chance and pushed him down on the bed, putting him under the duvet. It was weird for me to share a bed with someone, especially when it was Kai. Although it seemed to be normal for him, he still seemed to be a bit nervous as well.
With a sigh he pulled me closer in his arms again, so that my ear lay on his chest, listening to his fast heartbeat. It was like when I was a kid and didn’t feel well. My mother used to hold me just like Kai did!
Did I really want Kai to disappear out of my life? It seemed more like I wanted him to stay close. When I looked at Kai, his eyes were closed and his chest was slowly rising and sinking, he must have been very tired. The god of the underworld looked so peaceful when he as sleeping! Carefully I placed my head back on his chest and soon fell asleep myself.
When I opened my eyes again I was at a beach. Although I couldn’t remember ever going there before, it seemed so familiar. There was a tall man standing only a few yards away from me, dark hair, and blue eyes just like mine, a dark suit and a warm smile.
“Gillian! You look so much like your mother!” he said and came closer, “It’s almost time, darling! Be ready!” Then he disappeared and so did the beach. What was the meaning of this? And who was that guy? Why did he call me darling?
Still wandering about that, there was another strange thing. Why was I suddenly on my tummy, on something comfortable and mostly soft, but still strong? There was something holding me, like arms.
Suddenly I had to think about Kai. Was he alright? Was he sick? Was he sleeping right now? We had been at the beach, kissing. Was he really jealous? He liked me at least a little… What had he been apologizing for? What did he almost do? We were only kissing, right?
In a dark room.
On a bed.
Oh! So he was apologizing for almost seducing me! Right, so that was only a dream… With a sigh I opened my eyes and got to see Kai’s sleeping face again. He was really handsome, I didn’t know if this was part of his magic, but even if he wouldn’t be this beautiful, he’d still have a good character, at least as far as I got to know him.
Carefully, so I wouldn’t wake him, I put my ear on his chest to hear his heart beat. It was still fast, but not as fast as before. Was it normal for his heart to beat like this? Or was it because he didn’t feel well? Or was it because of me? Carefully I put my fingers on the side of my neck to feel my own heartbeat. It was quite fast as well, faster than usually anyway.
For a while I listened to the sound of his heart, while I thought about the whole situation I had gotten myself into. Why did I help that guy out again? Why did I not like him? Why did I want to get rid of him? When did it change anyway?
I had decided to help Kai, because that was something I really wanted to do, I really wanted to free those brainless idiots in my school. I didn’t like him because he was behaving like a god, like he was so much better than everyone else. I wanted to get rid of him because he had been annoying and was always teasing me.
When did it change? When did I actually start to like him? Was it at Halloween? When we first kissed? Or when Mika kissed me? Wasn’t that the point when I stopped fighting Kai, when I realised that I actually had feelings for him?
I actually really cared for him! I’ve had these strange feelings around him from the first moment I saw him, when he saved me after loosing my grip at the cliffs. What about Kai? He kept teasing me all this time, but why? When I met him at the beach he had been jealous.
Jealous because I’d been hanging out with other guys or because he thought of me as a human toy that just wouldn’t do as it was told? Still, I couldn’t help but worry about him. Kai didn’t seem to be alright maybe he should go to see a doctor?
With a sigh I let my attention return to the dark room we were in and the man I lay on. Kai seemed to be still sleeping. He looked kind of cute like this! But before I could have gotten into further temptations, the god of this mysterious place awoke and flexed his muscles under my body. “Morning, I think!” I said jokingly, “Do you always bring your friends from the beach directly into your bed in the underworld or where ever this place actually is.” Kai only smiled, “Would you mind if I’d say yes?”
“Why should I?” I asked before I could have stopped myself, “It’s your choice whom you bring here I presume.” “You can be relieved, since the answer is no.” Kai said with a curious smile into my face, but I had every one of my facial expressions under control, at least so far. His eyes didn’t even blink as he continued, “If I want anything I only have to request it and everyone brings me what ever I please, be it food, be it humans or be it sex. I can have everything and everyone, even you if I wanted to!”
I was not prepared for this! My face turned red and my mouth dropped open as he smiled at me as innocent as a newborn baby. That guy was just too much! And with that kind of smile! It took me a few seconds to get over the shock of his words. Unfortunately he was right! If he wanted me, I probably wouldn’t object, but because of a different reason than his servants or what ever he called them.
“If you get everything you want, why am I here?” I asked in a teasing tone, not sure if I really wanted to hear the answer. “I want you by my side.” Kai simply stated and came closer. What? In shock I closed my eyes and wished, I’d be at home in my own bed, alone! Nothing happened, so carefully I opened my eyes again, ready to shout at Kai, for annoying me with his jokes, but Kai was gone.
Confused I looked around and saw that the rest of his room was gone as well! Instead I looked at the white walls, covered with dark posters of bands that I liked and gothic pictures, my wide, wooden bed with the blue, stripy duvet and the matching pillows.
How had I gotten back? I was still wearing the clothes Kai had made me wear after the beach. Surprisingly I liked them! Over my bikini I wore a black short skirt with black lace at the edge, around the top of the skirt was a loose metal chain with a fancy lock with a dragon-like symbol. The top was a dark blue corsage with black flowery neat netting, covering it and blood red, silky lace on the inside, showing only at the lower edge towards my skirt and at the top towards my décolleté and also covering my arms down to my elbows.
Quickly I put on some socks and my black army boots with the also blood red laces and ran out of my house, towards the harbour and into the second boat that I owned, a small yacht. In a rush I climbed under deck and locked the door, hoping nobody would come here, confusing me any more.
Why did Kai do that? Why would he do that to me? Most of all, why did he send me back home alone after telling me those things? Not even with a way to pretend I’d been dreaming about that since I was still wearing those clothes he’d put me in? When I heard a knock on the door, I got a fright and jumped up. I saw the shadow of a man in front of the stained glass of the door and slowly walked over to see who it was.
“Gill, please open the door.” Kai said, waiting on the boat. “What do you want?” I asked as calm as I could and wiped the tears away that had been running over my face. “I want to talk to you!” he said and really sounded desperate and I opened the door. “Can I come in?” he asked and looked at me. “Sure. But why are you asking? Usually you’re coming in whether I like it or not!” I asked and stepped out of the way. “I thought I’d upset you even more if I only entered without seeking your permission.” Kai simply said and stepped in.
“What do you want?” I asked again and sat down on the couch. “I wanted to apologize for being so… direct before. I shouldn’t have said most of it. I was probably only overwhelmed by your presence in my bedroom and the temptation that I forgot how to treat a lady such as your self!” the god said and slightly bowed his head. “So what was it that you really meant?” I asked trying to control my voice, “What did you mean when you said you wanted me by your side?”
“I meant what I said.” Kai said and looked at me with a serious expression, “But I shouldn’t have said that when you had no where to go, although I was wrong about that, since I ended up alone all of a sudden when you were gone.” “When I was gone?” I asked confused now, “I thought you had sent me back home to… what would I know…”
“I didn’t want you to leave. I wanted you to stay!” he said and looked out the window. “So how did I get back home?” I asked confused and thought about what he had said, “What do you mean… you didn’t want me to leave? I thought I was only a nuisance you had to deal with because of that stupid bet you and your stupid cousin made?” “That was true in the beginning. Not anymore.” Kai looked at me again and came closer, “What I want right now is this!”
Still looking at me, he came closer and closer, gently put his hands on the sides of my face and kissed me passionately. Still in shock of his words and the intensity of this kiss, I just let it happen and let him gently push me down into the cushions of the couch, as he even intensified our kiss. Since he felt no resistance, he let his hands run over the sides of my neck, over my shoulders and behind my back. I felt his weight on me and his still only half dressed body. Automatically I put my arms around his neck and played with his short hair.
After what seemed to be an endless time, he released my lips and looked at me again, both of us breathing heavily. “This is what I want and this is what I feel!” he said, lowering his voice to a hush. For a few seconds I wasn’t even sure if I had heard correctly! But when his lips touched mine again for a short slight kiss, I was suddenly completely sure of his words and that I hadn’t misinterpreted those words. But was it even possible? Was it possible a god would fall in love with me? I was only a normal girl, wasn’t I?
“But why?” I asked in a little dace. Kai sighed, turned me around, since I was still holding on to his neck, and sat down on the couch with me on his lap. “I don’t know… I guess because you are so different, because you usually say what you think and you wouldn’t tell crap and stuff all the time like others, just to appear better or different then who you are. You make me forget about that stupid bet and you chose me over your friend who treated you well even after that kiss that almost made me go after him and kill him. But I knew you’d be mad and I know I don’t have a right to just claim you as mine and I know you’d hate me if I did.”
“So what does that mean now?” I asked confused and looked into his eyes. I wanted to know if he said the truth or not. I wanted to look into his eyes when he said he wanted me as his toy! “It means that I don’t want to share you with anyone, not even your friends, it means that I want to keep you at my side for the rest of my life and it means that I would give up my inheritance as a god to be at your side if it is that what you want!” he said seriously and pulled my chin closer to kiss me gently. “So does that mean you want me as your toy or what?” I asked even more confused. His words weren’t quite as clear as I had hoped about him wanting me as a toy. I wanted to hear him say it before I would wish him the worst and make him leave me alone.
“It means that I love you!” he said and let go of me, “It means that I don’t give a shit if you like me or not, since I love you anyways and it means that I want you to love me as well. It means that I want to live with you forever!”
The gods’ words really surprised me and my mouth dropped open, as did my eyes and for a moment I thought he was only teasing me again. “Well, you don’t have to force yourself to answer right now, I’ll wait and if it goes bad, I’ll have to be happy just staying at your side, as a fake boyfriend, as a protector, as a counsellor, or to comfort you!” he said softly and gently pet my back and my knees.
“How long…” I started, but shook my head, I shouldn’t ask… “I guess I’ve liked you from the start, it was fun to fight with you. I guess after Halloween I was sure that I liked you a lot, that I wanted you to be mine, but I only realised that I really love you, when you disappeared right in front of my eyes, just as I wanted to kiss you!” he said and shrugged his shoulders, “Just think about it, consider it!”
After a while, as soon as I caught myself again, I nodded and put my head down on his shoulder. Did he do that to tease me again? Would he laugh if I told him how I felt? Was it really Love that we felt? For a while it was quiet on the yacht and all I heard were the waves, our breathing and our heart beats. Everything else was quiet. The funny thing was that my reason for coming here, on my family’s yacht, was totally unimportant now! If I would trust him and give him a chance, his actions were mostly clear, since he probably kept teasing me to get my attention or just for fun. If I’d leave it as it was, he might give up on me some day and just cheat his way out of his stupid bet. This way I would loose him very soon. But if I told him… could we be together? But wouldn’t he leave as soon as he won the bet? I couldn’t find an answer, not even an idea of what he would do!
“What will you do after winning your bet?” I finally asked, still imagining a future with Kai at my side. “I’ll kidnap a young maiden and lock her up in my bedroom.” Kai said with a serious expression and bend forward to look at me. “Do you want me to tell your father?” I asked jokingly serious.
Suddenly his face turned almost white, “My father would eat a human for breakfast if he wasn’t banned! I wouldn’t even permit to let him talk to you on the phone!” “Ok!” I said quietly and looked at the handsome man whose face seemed to be made of stone. Carefully I placed my hands on the sides of his head and pulled myself closer and kissed his stone lips. “I promise!” I whispered and kissed him again, this time his stone like lips moved a little and his big eyes retuned to a normal size. When I kissed him again, his muscles relaxed a little again and he leaned back on the couch. “Can I hope?” he asked softly and seemed to be totally different from his usual self, so vulnerable and even a little scared, so I nodded and let him pull me closer into his embrace. It felt so good, so right to be in his arms and the temptation to just agree was extra tempting. But wouldn’t he just leave me like my parents? Oh why did I have to loose them so early?
Suddenly tears flooded my eyes and ran down my face. “Hey!” Kai said shocked and looked at me, “What’s wrong?” “Just leave me! It’s nothing!” I protested, looked to the side and wiped the tears away, but they just kept coming, “Just go!”
Kai sighed and gently pushed my head down onto his shoulder, gently rocking me as he held me close. He left me no choice but to cry into his shoulder. The thought of my parents often made me cry, but usually when I was alone and not in company! But for the first time there was a face appearing in my mind as I thought of my father. The man from my dream, could he be my father? I couldn’t tell from any picture in my house, since there were none and he’d left us soon after my birth, so I couldn’t remember his looks. The entire time Kai held me close and let me cry onto his shoulder without a word.
After what seemed like an eternity, I finally stopped crying and quickly wiped my tears away. “I’m sorry, usually I don’t cry!” I apologized, thinking, “At least not in public.” “Don’t worry about it!” he whispered and licked over my cheek. Blushing, I looked to the side and tried to keep my emotions under control. “Are you all right again?” he asked and pulled my face towards his again.
“I’m fine.” I said and looked at him. “Hmm…” he said, not sounding very happy about my words. “So is this yours as well?” Kai asked and looked at the inside of my yacht. “It is. My mom bought it before I was born. She loved boats and stuff, she told me, she got pregnant in this room. Maybe that’s the reason why I like this boat so much, it’s a direct connection to both my parents.” I sighed and looked at the furniture, where my parents used to spend there time.
“What happened? Where are they now?” he asked, still holding me close. “I never met my father, I think, and my mom died in an accident a few years ago. I miss her every day.” I sighed and looked onto the floor. “I’m sorry!” he said and lifted my head, “If I could do anything to make you feel better… I would try anything!”
Shaking my head again, I looked into his eyes now, “You would do anything? But why?” “It feels right to do anything to make you happy.” Kai said and looked a bit sad now, “Even if you’d wish for me to leave, to disappear forever, I would do that.” “No!” I protested immediately. He shouldn’t just leave! Not even after winning his stupid bet! “So you want me to stay?” he asked carefully and I nodded, since I’d been screaming that anyway. “So you do like me a little?” he asked and caught my chin before I was able to look down again. “If I do this, is there a chance of you liking it because it’s me?” he asked and kissed me passionately. It felt like this kiss pulled all the sadness out of my system and heated up my entire body.
When Kai released my lips, I blushed again and nodded. Gosh! I hadn’t been blushing this much my entire life! “I know I’m pushing my luck now, but could it be that you do know an answer already? Do you love me, Gillian?” he asked softly and looked into my eyes.
Should I or shouldn’t I? If I’d say yes, he might kiss me or make fun of me. But if I’d shrug my shoulders, he might not kiss me again until I told him about my feelings. And since it was Kai whom I had to handle, I wouldn’t dare to just tell him.
“Gill, I won’t leave you, unless you want me to!” he said quietly, “No matter what your answer is, I will stay. I’m too selfish to just leave you alone if you say no.” A smug smile appeared on his face, “In fact, I don’t even know what I’m doing here. Why do I care what you think? Why do I want your heart to be mine alone?”
Confused again, I shrugged my shoulders and Kai smiled even wider, “I honestly don’t understand and I don’t know why I care so much, but what the hell!” For a second he hesitated, then his lips crushed mine and I was completely overwhelmed when he kissed me.
As soon as he released my lips, I gasped for breath, before he kissed me again, this time not as forceful, but all the more intense. Could I just keep him? Totally out of breath I sunk into his embrace, incapable to hold my self anymore. “I think you’ve had enough for today. Anyway, schools on tomorrow.” Kai said regretful and kissed my forehead. My personal god turned me around and put me down into cushions. For a while I thought he’d brought me back into his dark bedroom, but when I looked around, I found myself in my own bedroom. What was the meaning of this? Did he honestly think I could go to sleep like this? Kai smiled and kissed my lips and then my forehead. “I think I love you too!” I whispered, suddenly struck by tiredness, that made me fall asleep almost immediately, the last thing I heard was Kai’s quiet curse, “Damn! Why does she say that only now? Damn sleeping magic!” I wanted to laugh and tease him for that perfect timing, but I was too deep in my sleep to act that way.
When I woke up the next morning, Kai was still holding me in his arms, but was now cuddling with me, under my blanket. “G’morning.” I said and smiled. “Wonderful if we skip school!” he suggested with a cheeky smile. “I’ve never skipped school and I won’t start today!” I protested and put the duvet aside, when the handsome god suddenly grabbed my arm and pulled me back into his arms. “Not so fast!” he said and pushed me back into the cushions, “I want to hear it again, or I’ll strip you right here, right now!”
Blood turned my face pink again and I quickly mumbled, “I love you too!” “Maybe in a way I can understand what you’re saying? Otherwise…” he said and suddenly I felt the material of the skirt disappear, “Although… Maybe I should make you say it a few more times until there’s nothing left to take off…”
I took a deep breath and looked at him, “I love you, although you always piss me off!” In the moment of surprise I knocked him over, holding him down with my hands and legs. “What is this going to be? Are you trying to seduce me here?” he asked calm and with a rather seductive smile. I blushed, again, looked away and quickly climbed off, “No, I did not!” The god on my bed smiled cheekily, “What would you like to wear today? Maybe a lovely dress or lots of black?” “Or maybe I can get dressed myself and surprise you?” I asked and opened my wardrobe.
Since the sun was shining, I took a short skirt and a matching blue top and went into the bathroom to get changed. “Stupid god!” I thought, when I remembered what had happened to the other skirt I’d been wearing before, “Always teasing and annoying me!” With a sigh I got changed, keeping my bikinis on, to go swimming after school again.
“Hey Kai, could you text the others if they wanna come swimming or cliff diving after school today? My phone should be in the top drawer next to my bed.” I called through the door as I brushed my hair. “Sure!” he said and I heard him look for it, “Found it. The lady on the picture, is that your mom?” “Yes.” I said and brushed my teeth. It was a picture of my mom when she was my age. With a sigh I washed my face and returned in my own clothes for a change to Kai.
“You look beautiful, Gill!” he said and put my phone on the nightstand beside my bed. “Thanks.” I said and smiled, “Are you ready?” “Almost,” he said and within a second we were in my kitchen, Kai wearing other clothes, serving me scrambled egg, toast, jam and fresh pressed orange juice on the table.
“You still have to tell me how you were able to get back home yesterday!” Kai said and watched me carefully while having breakfast. “I don’t know,” I said and shrugged my shoulders, “I… was a little shocked… your words kind of freaked me out and I… I closed my eyes and wished I was home again, when I opened my eyes, I was. I thought you had sent me back!”
“Seems like I chose a very special young lady,” he said with a smile and bent over to kiss me. “But I still don’t get how I managed to do that…” I said and sighed, “Well… who cares, it’s kind of cool though! And we have to get going otherwise we’ll be late for school!” The god of the underworld smiled and kissed my neck, “I wouldn’t mind being a little late… or just stay here!” Gently, I pushed him away, but just a little bit, “Remember about what we have to do? We have to get the entire school to start thinking again!”
My personal god sighed and pulled me close one last time to kiss me. When I opened my eyes, we were standing in front of school. “Could it be that you dislike walking or something?” I asked amused and let him take my hand and lead me towards our classroom. “Not particularly, but I want to spend more time with you alone… with no one there… only you… and me!” he said and placed his lips on my temple. Chuckling I let him pull me to my seat and was surprised to find Isabella waiting for me with an angry expression.
“Are you having fun?” she asked icily and stared at us. “Sure, why shouldn’t we? We’re allowed to have fun right? Or is it against Florus’ rules to have fun?” I teased, not letting go of Kai’s hand. “Fun’s over now! Just wait for it!” she said coldly, turned around and left to go to her own class.
“And she has to tell me about that because?” I asked and looked at Kai. “Maybe she doesn’t want to fight you anymore?” he suggested, “She seems to envy you…” “Her? Why should she envy me? What do I have that she doesn’t?” I asked confused and sat down. “You’ve got your free will, you do what ever you want, oppose the gods when ever you feel like it, don’t care about punishment and made me fall in love with you!” Kai whispered, so that only I was able to hear.
After school, Pierre came running towards us, worry in his eyes, “Hey! Have you heard? Isabella is throwing a party, she invited tons of celebrities and such and everyone is invited to come!” “Is she trying to bribe them again?” I asked and looked a bit annoyed, crossing my arms in front of my chest, “Didn’t she learn last time that she can’t buy their affection anymore?” Pierre looked at Kai, “Well… It seems to work, everyone is talking about going!”
“What?” I asked confused, “Are they really this stupid?” Kai chuckled, “I don’t think so… If she says that everyone is invited… shall we go too and check it out?” But I shook my head, “I don’t want to… I wanna go on the boat…” “How about you go, Pierre, take the guys and report to me tomorrow?” Kai asked and put his arm around my waist. “Sure, I’ll see you tomorrow!” he said and walked back to find Mika, Kimi, Henri and Louis.
“You won’t go to the party?” I asked and was surprised that he actually joined me while walking home. Plainly walking; without his magic. “No. I’ve said it before. I want to spend more time with you! I want to learn more about you, about your past, about what you like, dislike and what you taste like… everything!” I blushed at his words and just leaned my head against his shoulder, “If you say so…”
We went straight to the harbour, to my yacht and dropped our schoolbags next to the door. “Are you hungry?” I asked and walked into the little kitchen, “I can cook something for us.” “How about I eat you?” he suggested with hungry eyes and pulled me against his body, pressing his lips on mine in a surprisingly gentle kiss. “I thought you wanted to know more about me?” I asked teasing as our lips parted, letting my hands run over his strong arms. “True…” he whispered while his lips wandered over my neck.
“When is your birthday?” he asked and kissed my neck, right under my left ear. “January 16th!” I said and sighed, I knew what he did was more then just tempting, but it felt really good!